"K-Robbs Essay of Soul Searching," featured in Poetography: Hear Me Though:

The subject matter in this literary piece represent the message in the title. It is my intentions to free my mind via way of the journey into my past, through the trials and tribulations of my life experiences. My motives are to find myself using these self-analysis tactics aimed at identifying the two personalities in my character. One character lived in self-will allowing negativity to be the guide of life. The other character fought the good verses evil within because of his desire to change. K-Robb and Kevin, those are the names of the double personality man who against all odds, fought to rise up above the conditions he lived.

Soul searching will serve as a strong contributing factor for the solution of find peace. Looking into my past will help me identify with the defects of character, and will provide me with an attitude adjustment that will assist me towards a change in behavior and in my lifestyle. I have spent countless years living in the problems associated with suffering from substance abuse, family issues, job problems, and even before things got this far, it was the issue of childhood that I experienced school problems and living issues. In my quest for answers, I will address my questions in regards to my problems and issues, with hope that I can be honest and objective.

The original story was written in the form of an Essay, about the two personalities within me. Briefly I would like to share parts of this story. Kevin and K-Robb are one person with two different lifestyles. They struggled among themselves fighting within their soul, one wanting to be the man living in the will of God, as he understood, and the other, living in the world of street dreams without any concern in regards to the rights over the wrongs. Raised in a dysfunctional family system, he had no real foundation of the teachings of life. From early childhood years of addiction to crime and punishment, Kevin became self-taught about life. The choices he made as a pre-teen, teenager, and young adult created a manchild living a life without a clue, eventually leading him to repeated mistakes and periods of failure. Experiencing some moments in life during these self-teaching times where life had become better, Kevin would seem to have made it past some trials and tribulations that put him in harms way. However, for some reasons he would just float back into the negative thinking pattern and allow K-ROBB, to take control. The worst in character would re-surface and old behavior patterns would return.

After getting seriously frustrated over these set backs in life, Kevin decided to work on himself in a way he had never done before. Taking responsibility for his life and actions meant looking at the personal inventory of his life and going deep into the root of the problems associated with Kevins and K-Robbs behavioral issues. The results produced a real desire that led to the action steps towards change. Living in the solution, Kevin knows this is a continuing battle for life and, "STAYING FOCUSED", is just part of the solution that will provide him with the "SELF-HEALING", needed to live in changes.

( This Blog is a revised copy of, K-ROBBS ESSAY OF SOUL SEARCHING by. Kevin Fulton)

( A 1997 AWARD WINNING ESSAY WRITTEN ABOUT THE DOUBLE LIFE OF ONE MAN )